What Does It Mean to Be a Big? Just Showing Up is 99% of the Battle
“What if like a monkey jumped on that giraffe’s head and it became a mega animal with ultra super powers that could fly and jump around the world and like what if like that car had lasers that could shoot all the other cars and then it could like go a million miles an hour?!?!” - David
“Yeah that would be so cool!! And like what if then I pressed the turbo button on my car and it turned into a mega people eater!” - Me
Bursts of imagination, high flying elaborate ideas and vivid explanations of super hero scenes have become the normal Sunday activity for me these days. In fact, this is not an atypical conversation for me and David, my nine year old ‘little brother.’
Signing up for the Jewish Big Brother’s Big Sisters foundation has given a me a chance to use my imagination again. I might keep my eyes peeled on the road when I’m driving us around but it’s because there might be a bat mobile or a pegasus spewing lava that comes out of NOWHERE!
I was never a kid ;-) but to the best of my knowledge, most kids just want attention and a rock solid support system so when I learned about the Big Brothers, Big Sisters foundation here in LA, I thought it would be such a great way to give back and do some mentoring to a young kid. I quickly realized how impactful and monumental we would be in each other’s lives. With a twice a month, two hour minimum per session, I worked my calendar like a surgeon to find when would be the perfect days and times where I would find myself in his part of town and with enough time to do something fun, in a kid friendly environment, together.
When David asked me one time what I do in the other times that I’m not with him - I had to explain to him that I have a job, a girlfriend, and many other parts of my life that I have to allocate time towards. I could tell it didn’t really sink into his nine year old comprehension - he just couldn’t understand why I wasn’t with him more often. That was the moment when it really sunk in that what he’s looking for above all else is reliability. He’s looking and yearning for someone who will just show up, Regularly.
Six months into the brotherhood we’ve formed, I can confidently and consistently say, I’ve shown up. I always come on time and I always have something fun and exciting for us to do. Recognizing that I am new to LA and David has yet to see many facets of his own city, I thought no better way to get to know the city then to share it with someone else - someone with a VERY different perspective. A perspective more honed in on imaginary monsters and super heroes then making sure we follow Waze’s directions to avoid the 22 minute slow down on Wilshire.
David and I have had a chance to go to the LA zoo, hike the Culver Steps, See the movie Incredibles 2, Eat a ton of candy and pizza, Go to the beach, attend an NFL game and more. We’re still early on in our friendship and yet we’ve built some tremendous memories together already. What started as a program for David to have someone to spend time with, really turned into quite the mutual benefit. I can affectionately say, having a little brother has been one of the highlights of my new life in Los Angeles.